no 3: way hotter than your average luddite
Some may call me an ‘unc’ (or whatever the female version is, an aun?), but I am very tech-averse. As a lifelong New Yorker who has been around since the student MetroCard was green, I can safely say I am the right person to speak on this issue. So, below I’ve listed 10 technological advancements that could be setting us back, instead of forward.
Mobile Ordering
The other day, I went to get a bagel, something that should normally take 5-10 minutes max. However, for some reason, everyone who mobile ordered had priority, and a bagel was not in my hand till 30 minutes later, a severe crime. This take is hot, but I truly believe that unless you have a medical reason for not being able to leave your house to get a bagel (being hungover does not count), you might not deserve such a delicious Sunday breakfast.
Headphones
Now I’m as guilty of this as everyone else, but I sometimes fear what constant headphone use is doing for us in these city streets. What happened to eavesdropping? If you’re listening to a podcast, you could miss a dramatic breakup happening in the street, or a friend trying to say hi.
iPad Babies
There is enough discourse about iPad babies where I don't have much to add to the conversation, but I still get a little sad when I see babies in Central Park more interested in Cocomelon than anything else.
Tap To Pay
Another controversial take here, and something I use quite often. However, I still believe in my heart of hearts that cash is king. Many of the best places are cash only and at risk of dying out. Also, even though I never use one anymore, the fact that the Metrocard is going to die in my lifetime is an extremely sad loss. Add that to the list of things I’ll have to tell my grandkids “back in my day” about.
TikTok
TikTok might be the worst offender of them all. I think especially because, back in the day, when you found a cool new spot, you would tell a handful of friends. Now, someone posts it on TikTok, and 2 million people see the spot. I agree this can be good for business, but sometimes I don’t want to wait in a line wrapping around the block to get a coffee because it is viral.
Rayband Recording Glasses
I’ve started to see a few tech bros wearing these and influencers as well. Call me crazy but someone being able to record everything around them without others knowing makes me a little nervous.
Those OneWheel Rider Things
ESPECIALLY when they are zooming in the bike lane.
Phones
OK, OK, take this with a grain of salt. I mostly mean when I’m walking down the street and see that every other person is bent over looking at reels instead of paying attention to where they are going. AND I’m pro reading on the train, even if it is performative. Even a performative reader reads a page sometimes.
New G Train
Every time I ride the new G without the individual cars, it freaks me out. Is there any purpose besides making it more likely I run into someone from my high school?
Union Square Climate Clock
Every time I go to Union Square, it becomes a stressful situation as a giant clock is telling me we only have 3 good years left. Do I still need to invest if the world will explode into a fireball before we have another summer Olympics? Of course, we should be trying to save the planet, but some bigger offenders should be tackled first.
